Hugs and stuff

USA Heart

A lot of post-election commentary has been written dissecting “what went wrong” with the 2016 presidential election. I don’t think any thing went wrong. I think liberals didn’t understand the extent of the racism, sexism, fear and disillusionment in this country.

Among full- and part-time workers in the U.S., blacks earn just 75% as much as whites in median hourly earnings and women earn 83% as much as men (source: Pew Research Center). This isn’t anecdotal; it’s a sad fact that minorities and women have moaned about but accepted for far too long. Racism is a fact. Sexism is a fact. And the results of the presidential election prove it.

As a “cool girl” who likes to hang with guys, I give men the benefit of the doubt that they feel women are their equals. Even when it’s pretty obvious that a guy doesn’t even have real friendships with females, I’ll socialize pleasantly with him knowing that we’re not likely to ever have a meaningful conversation. (To be fair, most of the men I interact with respect and like women.) In the past, I thought that calling someone sexist said more about me than it might about them. Labeling someone sexist seems petty, spiteful, bitter (a term people use to belittle women and minimize valid and reasonable ideas). But except in a few token cases, though I’ve racked my brain for an answer, I can find no other explanation for the outcome of the election other than racism and sexism. It’s so blatantly in my face, I cannot ignore it.

I’m going to lose friends. And I’m okay with that. What I’m not okay with is the idea that all opinions are valid. Racism is not a valid standpoint. Sexism is not an acceptable view. It’s impossible for me to tolerate sexist men any longer.

What am I going to do now?

Tell my daughters that I love them. Tell them that they are worthy of respect—both from themselves and from others—and that they deserve same pay as men. Tell my girls that speaking your mind doesn’t make you an arrogant bitch. Hug my family and friends. Be kind. Appreciate.

The next four years won’t be that rough for my family. My man and I are both educated and earn decent money (I would be making more if I had a penis, but that might make things awkward in the bedroom). We own our home and basically don’t have any worries. We will probably keep more of what we earn once taxes are cut—even though the country needs our tax dollars more than we need the few thousand we will save. I will travel less and spend more time at home with my family. I plan to hunker down and work hard and maybe close the income gap another 1% in 2017.

And have lots of hugs.

unplugged

I recently returned from a trip back to New York. We arrived in Queens, amid the usual insane driving and traffic, loud noises and … well, it’s New York. I had just completed a big design project and needed some down time. But I couldn’t relax. I took work calls and dealt with client issues. I {READ MORE}

Buying a new home is hard and other luxury problems

I’ve played the hermit crab this spring, retreating to my shell… mostly because I’ve been convalescing (read: sleeping 9+ hours a night) after a compression fracture of my L1 vertebra during some Xtreme sledding in early winter. (Sledding is now off the approved activities list btw.) Throughout my recovery, I have been keeping busy, though—looking for a {READ MORE}

(gift)wrapped up

Each holiday season I brainstorm ideas for Christmas gift wrapping. A few years ago I wrapped gifts using kraft paper and stamps, which was tactile and festive. This year, I’m not sure yet what I’ll do. I’ve been collecting pine cones and evergreen twigs… maybe something will materialize out of them. I’ve seen many cool and beautiful wrapping ideas {READ MORE}

Nawlins

I recently returned from a graphic design conference in New Orleans. What a gritty, smelly, inspiring, beautiful city! And people are super friendly. I’m so glad I got a chance to go there. Old meets new in New Orleans—in architecture, tourism and music. My favorite places were the Little Flea Nola, Magazine Street, the cemeteries, Cochon Restaurant and Mardi {READ MORE}

The Uninspired Designer

I just got back from a graphic design conference. The conference was titled, “Revival.” That is exactly how I feel after four days of rousing talks, spirited roundtable discussions, and a lack of immediate client demands: refreshed, renewed, revived. While at the conference, a client inadvertently sent me a long email thread in which she said I was “uninspired.” While {READ MORE}

egg shell herb starts

While it has been a warm winter and early spring out west, in the northeast we’ve suffered a cold, long winter. But the sun is finally shining and the birds are singing their sweet songs. Hello, Spring! Now that temps are consistently above 40 degrees and the fear of frost is over, it’s time to {READ MORE}

easter egg tree

Happy Easter! I made glitter eggs in anticipation of the Easter holiday. I considered the best way to display these sparkly puppies… a cylindrical glass vase or a low-rimmed bowl would work. But I was inspired by a friend’s “egg tree” and decided that was definitely the way to go. If you’re hanging around feeling jittery after eating your kid’s {READ MORE}

glitter easter eggs

Our Easter tradition is to visit my family in California. Northern California is spectacular in the spring. The verdant hills glow with new growth and smell like luscious damp dew in the mornings. The temperature (low 70s) feels perfect. And I don’t have to cook anything while there except egg salad for Easter lunch. Yum! My girls and I haven’t {READ MORE}

wreath evolution

Growing up, my mom had a little cave-like space off the garage that she used to create wreaths and sprays (non-circular wreaths, basically). She spent hours at a time messing around with dried plants, her clippers, metal wire and a hot glue gun. My mom and a couple of lady friends would put on an annual holiday “boutique” {READ MORE}